Freelancing gets a lot of “face time” here on the blog – not because it’s a sweet walk in the park and skip through a field of frangipani flowers every day, but because it’s based on the ability to choose how we use the gift of time when it comes to our career.

Are you at that “in between a job and a business” stage and find yourself growing through challenges, going through the motions, feeling hopeful about the process, or actively mapping a route forward?

Maybe you’ve set a steady rhythm between the two that works well for you in this season, but if there is a long-term vision to own a business and a current struggle to manage time…here’s the first entry in this series that’s written with you in mind.

Meet photographer and author of “Gimme A Home Birth – The Birth Story I Didn’t Expect,” Korena Darnelle.

Balancing The Work – Being An Employee And Entrepreneur (Part 1)

“I could hear my alarm going off. As I rolled over to stop the blaring sound I wondered what day it was as I tried to ease the fog from my mind. I sucked my teeth as the reality sunk in that it was only Wednesday and not Saturday morning as I’d originally thought.

Turning to pray, I was thankful for the job that paid the bills but in my heart, I knew I hated this job and felt that each day spent there was just another waste of my time and my talents.

My supervisor once called me aside and told me that I don’t have the mindset of an employee and I agreed. I truly believe that I was destined for greater things than sitting behind a desk. But all in time. For now, I have to balance the work and juggle the reality of being both an employee and an entrepreneur.

 

It’s not easy. Some days I wake up enthusiastic and ready to face the day and other days I just want to lay tucked under the pillows. My days begin just after four in the morning, getting myself and the family ready to face the day.

From the time I get to work, its answering calls and solving tasks, chipping away at my to-do list, fighting hard not to let my mind get carried away with the other things I really want to do.

Finally, lunchtime comes and off I go for that blissful 60 minutes of time to do as I please. I respond to emails, complete blog articles and do research for upcoming photo projects while eating lunch and hoping not to end up with pasta sauce on my clothes.

Wishing I could stay longer but it’s time to go back to the desk and begin the new countdown until it’s time to pick up the family and head home.

When it’s time to leave that extra surge of energy comes. I’m free once more. Usually followed by a small surge of guilt because I know my heart is never 100% into the job.

A mentor once said that I need to make a decision sometime soon because I’m doing an injustice to my work, my clients and mainly to myself never being able to fully dedicate all my brainpower to one task.

As I left I prayed for the day to come soon when I’d be better able to give myself to being the entrepreneur. Waking up early, getting my family out the door but having a full day planned of voice acting, writing and photography. 

 

Many talk about the work-life balance, but my hardest balancing act to date is the employee versus the entrepreneur balance.

By the time I get home and get the little one to bed, it’s now time to get in gear. I have two hours to push off work.

Many times that means I’m constantly behind. Websites aren’t updated as they should, emails aren’t responded to as they should and photos aren’t edited as quickly as they need to be.

Sometimes I pull an all-nighter only to feel the effects the next day when my little one wakes earlier than expected in need of mummy time. I’m off to work tired and drained wondering for the thousandth time when I’d be in a better position to break the cycle.

When those eight hours of the day will finally be my own again to do as I please and build the empire that I so desire. But I can’t build without a plan and I can’t build if I’m buried in debt so I need the job to pay the bills for now, to learn certain skills for now and to build my network. Then someday soon I’ll take the jump. 

 

Maybe I’m really not balancing the work. The entrepreneur side of me is suffering and feeling bonded and chained. Restricted to what time of the day remains and the employee side of me is tired of being chained to the desk and the boss for little appreciation. But each needs the other for now. So I do what I need to do to make it work.”

Korena Darnelle is a singer, photographer and author of “Gimme A Home Birth – The Birth Story I Didn’t Expect.” Buy it Online here. She’ll be leading this topic right here, sharing insightful and honest posts written in her signature style, twice a month. Visit her on IG today @korenadarnelle

Here’s her book which will soon be available for sale online and in stores.

Are you employed while also managing your own business? Have a question you’d like Korena to address or a comment you’d like to add to encourage someone else reading this post?

 “Balancing The Work – Being An Employee And An Entrepreneur” by Korena Darnelle, first appeared on “Joy within” blog